NICU reunion

Make a Smilebox slideshow

This past Saturday the whole family made it to the NICU reunion. To say it was an important day to us is an understatement. During our stay in the modules, spending time getting to know other families in the waiting room and learning how to lean on each other, the reunion picnic wasn't something we focused on. That would come later. As time passed, and we all went home, one family at a time, the reunion was still something that sounded like a nice idea, but wasn't a reality. Our little graduates still had so many struggles ahead of them and a big party (with big germs) just wasn't something we could risk. This year was different. We still have hurdles to tackle, but we can finally look back and see how far we have come and celebrate. We could enjoy one another's families and watch the little ones who once fought so hard just to be here, smile and interact with each other - and reconnect with the incredible people who gave so much of themselves to give our children a chance at a better life - some days, a chance at life period. It was joyful, it was poignant, it was entertaining and it was a relief. Enjoy the pictures.

Miracle Blizzard Day!!

I just saw the advertisements for this a few days ago, or I would have blogged about it sooner!! Go get a blizzard and enjoy the treat knowing that you have also made an easy donation to the miracle network. It will help hospitals and families, like Riley, who so desperately need it. I don't have to tell most of you what Riley means to us, you know. For those who stumble across this site - I'll try to summarize. Uncertainty is never easy, but when the question mark sits squarely on your child's life, the fear that comes with the unknown is magnified. I carried Gabriel for nearly nine months and although I couldn't change what had gone wrong in development, I could do my best to care for myself and ergo care for him. While I still carried him, he was safe. When he was born, what little control I had was stripped away. As parentts, you are supposed to know what to do for your child, what soothes them and how to care for them. They don't come with manuals, but you figure most of it out or rely on the advice of others. I couldn't fix this, couldn't even hold him for a minute and tell him it would be ok. He needed immediate care that was beyond anything I knew about and the helplessness was overwhelming. I didn't know what to do, had no answers, but Thank God we were in a place with people who did. They knew what to do when we didn't. Even when they weren't sure what to do next, they never stopped searching for the answers or the next step. Gabriel was exactly where he needed to be and between their hands and God's hands, we have a miracle of our own. He crawls all over the house, makes messes and has a smile that lights up your soul and chases away even the gloomiest of moods. We can't imagine our lives without him and are grateful we don't have to.

So if you happen to pass by a DQ today, swing through the drive-thru or stop in. Order your favorite blizzard or try something new, doesn't matter. Diet or no diet, you can feel good about what you are doing. If you just can't break the diet (or are lactose intolerant) throw a dollar in the jar, most DQ's collect money for the miracle network. If you've followed our story, you are firmly part of our miracle through your thoughts and prayers - think how amazing it would be to be part of a whole network of miracles.

Just like last year, if you get one, leave a comment and let us know what you got!! I'll probably go for the German Chocolate....

I noticed it has been two weeks since the last update - and it has been a busy two weeks!! Everything specific to Gabe is on his blog, so feel free to check in there as well. Yesterday we celebrated Josh's birthday - I suppose I can let him reveal his age if he chooses. Josh and the older boys hung out in the morning, playing his vintage nintendo while Gabe napped. In the afternoon they played miniature golf while Gabe took his afternoon nap with Grandma - I guess I should have said "at" Grandma's...or maybe it was with....I'm not sure. I had to work all day, and it was very busy and hectic. I was exhausted when I hit the door, but did my best to rally and not be a party-pooper. We did go OUT for dinner, so that was a big help!! The boys and I had made a "cookie-cake" for Josh on Tuesday, since he prefers that to regular cake, which we all enjoyed with Josh's family (minus Kaci and Justin - here in spirit) after dinner. Last year we ate downtown in Indianapolis for Josh's birthday dinner, and it was awful. (Don't go to Alcatraz) This year was an improvement in many ways. Josh got several new shirts and money towards a GPS. Hmmmm....are those gifts suggesting something? I'll let everyone ponder that.

That brings us to today's very big anniversary. Today marks a full year that our family has been home together, whole and complete. My eyes are already watering, so this will be brief. I have another full day of work to get through! I think all I want to say right now is how much we appreciate everyone who has supported us this past year - and even when we first learned about Gabe's condition. It has been an incredible journey from there to here and we have all grown along with Gabe and also learned what we are made of. Some of it good and some of it not so much, but all of it part of an incredible tapestry of change and evolution.

Celebration!

It has been a busy summer for our family! We celebrated the fourth at Lincoln this year with Josh's family (almost ALL of them). It is always extra special to celebrate this holiday with family, but it was even more wonderful that the five us were together this year. Last year I spent the holiday at Riley, taping a small flag to Gabe's crib and watching the Indianapolis fireworks display from the top of the parking garage with the Hufty's and some of the nurses and their families. The boys were in Evansville with Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Kaci and Aunt Brooke and Josh was working. This year, as we sat on a blanket beneath the stars and waited for the first burst of color and spark, Josh leaned over and commented "Better than last year, huh?". Amazingly I hadn't been thinking about the year before (I think I have made comparisons between this year and the last on a near daily basis) and that comment had the tears welling and then running down my cheeks. It was a definite role reversal as I am usually making those comments to Josh.

Despite some illness (mainly Justin and then Gabe) it was another great week at Lincoln. Everyone had a great time and arrived home safely, but exhausted. I am posting a slideshow of our time at Lincoln, which will summarize the week better than I could do in words. Josh and I couldn't be there for all of the festivities, so if anyone has some good pictures, I can always add them! It is a little lengthy, but enjoy if you have a few minutes.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

As I type...

I am watching Gabe crawl back and forth between two toys, pulling himself up to his knees to reach what he wants. He is once again making huge strides and figuring out how to achieve what he wants. He has officially pulled himself up to standing without any help. I had put him to bed just a little while ago and as I was setting out my running shoes (optimistic for a morning run - we'll see) Gabe started fussing. He has gotten into the habit of throwing his pacifier out of the bed, then either wanting it back to go to sleep, or to chuck it again. I walked in to find him pulled up to his knees and peering over the side at his pacifier on the floor. It was a funny sight since the older boys never pulled up on the side of their cribs at this age and only did so rarely as they got older. They NEVER tried to climb over the rails - which usually surprises and baffles most parents when I tell them. When I walked in, Gabe started smiling at me, indicating he was not necessarily close to sleeping yet. As I stood there, unable to supress my own grin even knowing I was no longer going to bed as planned, he grabbed the rail and pulled all the way up to standing. To my knowledge this is the first time he has done this, and Josh (who walked in behind me) and I got to witness it. I don't know about Josh, but I felt a multitude of emotions at this one action. I'm not going to gush or get emotional, but it was truly wonderful to see. He's getting busier by the day - and life is getting more and more intresting...

A little earlier in the evening I was summoned into Justin and Kendrick's room. Despite already being tucked into bed with their lullabye CD softly playing, they wanted to talk about VBS. I tried all afternoon to get them to tell me about it, but they were too busy with their own summertime afternoon activities to stop and talk. Now they were ready and not about to be put off. I could have sternly reminded them we went on a late bike ride and they needed to get to sleep for VBS the next day and during the school year I probably would have. Josh had Gabe, so I opted to sit on the bed and let them tell me about their adventures. I enjoyed hearing the excitement in their voices - especially when their initial reaction to VBS was a little dubious. It was obvious they really listened and got involved in the activities. As I was getting up to leave the room, Justin hugged me and said he was glad they signed up for Bible school because he was really having fun.

So as I sit and type, also watching Gabe play and ponder, I also notice the handful of toys that haven't been put away. There are items on the dining room table I meant to put away and a bag by the door full of stuff I meant to sort through and put away. Oh well. It'll be there tomorrow. Tonight I got to sit and listen to my busy boys happily tell me about their day - won't there possibly come a day when I find out everything from their friends, if I'm lucky? I also got to watch Gabe achieve another milestone. He's sitting just a few feet away with a the tv remote he pulled down from the little table next to the rocker - and rolling his eyes at me. Oh yes, that is a new trick. He loves to roll his eyes up and then looks back at us and grins. So the stuff I meant to do can wait.

Happy Father's day

I made a slideshow for Josh for today - the boys helped pick out the picture of themselves. It does take a few minutes to view, but it was fun and I think Josh enjoyed the little trip down "Dad's Memory Lane". We had a nice day, but played it a bit low-key since Josh had to work. Yesterday we went swimming and today I fixed breakfast, we went to mass then out to eat with Josh's family.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Busy Weekend

The purpose of our trip up North this weekend was to say our final goodbyes to Grandma - she passed away in January. We weren't sure we were even going to make it at one point. Unfortunately we didn't know anything about the torrential rains that swept through central Indiana until we were witnessing the after-effects. As we got closer to Terre Haute, we finally picked up a local radio station and were astonished to hear Vigo county was under a state of emergency for flooding. Sure enough there was water streaming over 41 and rescue boats were coming and going with people and pets. It was surreal. We were right in the middle of a scene straight out of the television. People were standing on the edge of 41, wrapped in blankets and cuddling their pets. Apartment buildings had become islands and a car had drifted into a ditch. We made it through, but then encountered more problems trying to head East on I-70, which was washing away. Hours later we arrived at our hotel in Lebanon with the rest of the family arriving shortly after. Everyone had their own story to tell, but mostly we were all just happy to be done traveling and together.



Several people met Gabe for the first time, including my brother,his wife and his son. It was fun to finally share him with them in person. All three boys had a great time and entertained everyone in our group - and other groups at the hotel as well, I think. Sunday afternoon was the memorial service and final burial of Grandma's ashes. Mike and Dad had their guitars and sang Grandma's favorite hymns. She was a beautiful and courageous lady who has been greatly missed. She had so many great qualities. She certainly perservered through more than her share of family crises and was the glue that held it all together. She had a temper that was formidable, but quick to dissipate and she didn't hold a grudge that I knew of. All are qualities I can only hope to aspire to, but probably the two qualities I admire most would be here adventurous spirit and her ability to laugh at herself. I certainly make more than my share of mistakes, but don't always like to acknowledge them - it would be far better if I could laugh at them and move on. I'm working on it.
**Note on laughing at oneself - I'll let Mom fill you in on her "funny" moment at the memorial. Mom?

Yesterday Josh and the older boys went down to the Children's Museum of Evansville. When they picked me up from work, I figured from the boys' faces they had a good time. No, it was not the excited smiles or little voices telling me about their adventures, rather it was the paint! Kendrick was painted up as a pirate. Justin had his initials "tattooed" on his arm. Not too surprising he didn't want the face paint. I am impressed he let Josh paint his arm. They had a late lunch at IHOP and then got in several rounds of Super Mario Brothers on Josh's vintage Nintendo. All in all, I'd say it sounded like a great "guys day". Since returning from North Carolina, the boys seem to think they need an "agenda" each day. Thanks Mom and Dad.